For the Love of Horses: Exploring Our Inconsistent Relationship with Non-Human Animals With Our Children

This post is by contributing blogger Kelly Coyle DiNorcia, a graduate of our M.Ed. program, and a humane educator specializing in helping parents raise joyful, compassionate children. Find out more about Kelly's work at her website Beautiful Friendships, and her blog, Ahimsa Mama.

Image courtesy of enimal.

My six-year-old daughter has fallen passionately in love with horses and horseback riding.  In many ways, I think this is a wonderful way for her to connect with a non-human animal in a very deep and meaningful way.  The relationship between horse and rider is one that is unique, and really very beautiful.  I am adamant that if my daughter wants to ride that she be fully involved in the horse’s care.  She grooms the horses, tacks them herself, and cares for them after riding.  She understands that a horse isn’t like a bicycle that she can just throw in the garage when she’s done with it - this is an animal with wants, needs, and a distinct personality, and an animal that requires a huge amount of care (and food). 

All of that is fine and well, but there is another side to the horse world that is troublesome to me.  As much as the people at our barn love, care for, and respect the animals, the horses are still commodities.  Most of the animals are not simply companions but serve a purpose, be it racing or shows or lessons, and they will be moved on when they have outlived their usefulness.  Some horses spend the spring at the track and the rest of the year at the barn; others spend the summer on a farm and come back to the barn when the weather turns cold.  Mares can be bred in one place, gestate and deliver in another, and their foals may be shipped out as soon as they are weaned.  I’m sure these transitions are not easy on the horses.  No - I know they aren’t, because it is evident in the animals’ behavior.  I wonder what becomes of these creatures when they can no longer be ridden due to age or infirmity.  Who is going to pay to maintain a horse who can’t be ridden, as well as one who can?  Maybe I don’t really want to know.

It is so difficult to manage the messages our children receive when it comes to attitudes about non-human animals.  There are animals who are eaten and those whom we would never eat.  There are those who live in our homes, and those we go to great lengths to keep out.  There are those who are companions, and those who have jobs, and those we prefer not to interact with at all.  There are those who live in zoos, and those who live on farms, and those who live in the wild.  There are those who are hunted, and those who are protected.  It’s all so arbitrary, really.  I want my daughter to respect non-human life, but is that end best served by indulging her love of horses despite my misgivings?  Is it served by visiting zoos so that she can experience the magnificent creatures who live there and having frank conversation about the value of freedom and happiness to those animals?  Is it served by taking a hard line?  Or is it best served by sharing these questions with my daughter and examining the shades of grey?


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